Thanksgiving wisdom from Penny Lane

Your holiday might not suit Norman Rockwell, but it can still rock well

This will never make it onto any list of best Thanksgiving movies — mainly because it has nothing to do with Thanksgiving — but if you want to go off-menu for the holiday, try “Almost Famous.”

An adaptation of the film opened on Broadway this month, telling Cameron Crowe’s semi-autobiographical story about a teenager writing for Rolling Stone in the 1970s. You can find three elements of the Thanksgiving spirit in this clip, which starts with William Miller (Crowe’s character, age 15) accompanying a guy who has gone rogue, pissed off at his bandmates, then there’s an icy reunion on their road trip, then William has a heart-to-heart with Penny Lane, a groupie and muse.

“I have to go home,” he tells her.

“You are home,” she replies.

Thanksgiving might bring to mind football and gorging and Norman Rockwell paintings, and maybe those images make you focus on what you’re missing instead of what you have. You don’t feel thankful, just lonely.

Here’s a Penny for your thoughts: You are home. You just don’t realize it. 

I’m an orphan, in the loosest sense of the world. Mom and Dad are gone, but I’m over 18 (and over and over and over). We were close, emotionally and geographically, and I still miss them, on Thanksgiving and always. They were my home.

But this ad reminds me of home, too, even though Mom and Dad never drank Scotch, and Cathy doesn’t, either.

I wrote before about how people loved certain songs because they reminded them of a time when they fit in, adjusting to a new place or new stage of life. In what probably qualifies as a pathetic commentary on my life, this J&B ad does that for me.

One of the loneliest times for people, me included, is right after college, when friends scatter and you’re far away from any home you’ve ever known. My loneliness ended with a bottle of Scotch, but in a good way. 

I made a couple of, um, more mature friends who were Scotch drinkers — something exotic when you’re straight out of college. Through them I met other friends — most older, all welcoming.

I was home.

There’s a great ensemble song in “Rent”:

Let’s always stay friends.
Though we may have our disputes
This family tree’s got deep roots.
Friendship is deeper than blood
That depends
Depends on trust
Depends on true devotion
Depends on love
Depends on not denying emotion!

That brings us back to our fictional band in “Almost Famous.” They have their disputes — some real, some petty — and that’s part of home, too.

The central part of our opening video is a song, but it’s really about making peace, with others and with yourself. Too many people wind up estranged from home because they won’t give an apology or send a text or reach out a hand. A few stubborn months turn into a pile of lost years. 

Human nature will usually run its course, if you get back on the damn bus.

My home has been with Cathy for 35 years now, but I have lots of timeshares. When COVID cooperates, a restaurant that dishes up trivia is home for me and a bunch of friends each Monday. Then there’s a monthly Sunday breakfast with my bestie, lunches with friends old and new, birthday greetings now and then, accompanied by thoughts of Scotches past.

Even in a quiet week, I might have one timeshare or another on the East Coast — someplace I’ll never visit for Thanksgiving, but will be thankful for each day, even if all we do is text or Zoom.

So if you feel lonely this time of year, maybe you have more homes than you think you do. Your body is stuck in one place; your heart has no boundaries. 

Murphy Slaw

Something old: That would be Lewis Black, who resents how young people are horning in on things like early bird dinners and AARP memberships. 

Something new: When a magician baffles Penn & Teller this completely, it’s worth watching. 

Something borrowed: I’m mostly staying away from tweets this week because it looks like Twitter is about to implode, but this one is sweet if it’s still around:

Monica Lewinsky (she/her) @MonicaLewinsky

so, @petersagal ‘s thread led me to this: i’m curious to hear people’s positive experiences/memories from twitter. i’ll start…

Just in case, a bonus: Even if the tweet below vanishes, this link should give you the gist of it.

🥀_Imposter_🕸️ @Imposter_Edits

There was a baby chimp born at The Sedgwick County Zoo, the baby had to be put on oxygen for a few days. This is a clip of it being reintroduced to its mother for the first time.

Something blue: If you have panic attacks or know people who do, maybe this will help. (By the way, if you ever see something I mention that’s really important to you and you hit a paywall, email me and I’ll try to help.) This is a tweet about it, if the tweet survives:

The New York Times @nytimes

Though people mainly associate panic attacks with the mind, they’re actually constellations of symptoms, both physical and cognitive. Here's a look at what happens in the body during one and ways you can cope.

nyti.msThe Anatomy of a Panic AttackUp to a third of adults will experience at least one panic attack in their lifetime. Here’s why they happen, and some coping strategies that work.