OK, so maybe your liver and libido aren’t what they were 40 years ago, but you’re at a similar crossroads. Just as your 20s probably set the stage for the rest of your career, your 60s will do that for the rest of your life (gulp).
If you develop good habits when you’re young — or at least learn from your mistakes — déjà vu can be your friend. Here’s how:
Forget Pavlov
School teaches us to expect regular critiques of our work, but sometimes you’ll go weeks or months without hearing much from your boss — unless you screw up, of course. So if you’ve conditioned yourself to draw strength from praise, you might need to find something else to drool over.
That thirst probably evolved into good habits, like looking for mentors, learning from colleagues, going to conferences, thinking independently, understanding what it takes to become the A student.
Roll that Betamax tape forward to age 60. Whether you’re still an A student or just coasting to a C, the insecurity is long gone. You’ve conditioned yourself into something that meets your needs, if not for praise, at least for humanity.
When you give all that up, what good habits will you develop to take its place?
Be bold
It’s fine to stay in school into your 30s or work into your 70s, as long as you’re doing it for the right reasons — not out of fear or inertia. Getting a master’s degree, for example, can be a great accomplishment if it helps your career or personal growth. For too many, though, it’s a boondoggle, running up student debt while avoiding the real world for another year or two.
If you simply cannot afford to retire, that’s one thing. But if you’re sticking around because of fear or inertia or even because you love your work, make sure you’re not sacrificing something precious, like spending time with loved ones or seeing the world.
There’s a great line in this song: “You will still be here tomorrow, but your dreams may not.” Tomorrows aren’t guaranteed for anyone, of course, but they’re even more precarious once you pass 60.
Do an internship
Lots of 20-year-olds use internships or apprenticeships to jumpstart their careers. They build contacts, learn about roles and about themselves, consider what would be a good fit.
Do a trial run for retirement. Can you work part time or take a few weeks off without traveling somewhere? How do you spend those hours? If they’re boring, that’s OK. Learn from it. It fine to decompress in retirement, but you’ll still want a reason to get up in the morning.
Netflix and swill won’t cut it.
Shape up
Maybe you’re as preoccupied with the same body parts at 60 as you were at 20, but I’m guessing a few others have crept into the picture. We aren’t exactly kind to our bodies when we’re young, whether it’s the Freshman 15 or experimenting with drugs or pulling all-nighters.
The working world has dangerous patterns all its own. Maybe you have unhealthy breakfasts or bolt your lunches or still experiment with drugs, even if they’re prescription ones. Maybe you discount the toll that stress takes on you, physically and mentally. What habits can you start breaking?
If you’re a 60-year-old man of average health, you have about a 1 in 3 chance of making it to 90. Women and healthier men fare even better. Check for yourself with this table, then work on improving your odds.
Plant seeds
The 60-year-olds who’ve had a good life often have several things in common, especially luck and growth. They probably invested early, whether in learning or IRAs or relationships, and failed miserably once in a while. But they succeeded far more often.
It’s easy to coast to a C in your 50s, in life as well as in work, when you should be investing with the same kind of boldness you did in your 20s — in personal growth, in relationships, in your health.
Decades from now, you want to echo another Cat Stevens line: “Look at me. I am old, but I’m happy.”
Murphy Slaw
Something old: If you want advice from those who retired and learned some lessons the hard way, this Wall Street Journal article will help.
Something new: Maybe revenge is a dish best served with cake. This Twitter employee gave her ex-employer a bit of the bird.
Something borrowed: Instead of sending a friend a text, maybe you should try a voice memo. This explains why.
Something blue: Speaking of how our vices of choice change, check out this tweet from sports reporter Sarah Spain’s trip to Italy.
It's like being on the high school wrestling team with chokes and submissions. You're right about the socialization. Meet all kinds of great people from all walks of like. At my club the call me the mayor. I get to know everyone
Come train Brazilian Jiu jitsu with me. It will keep you young.